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Wedding Information - Wedding Roles



Making a Good Choice

There are no firm rules in choosing the maid of honour (or matron of honour if married) or as is also known now, chief bridesmaid. As such, a personal decision it's difficult to establish set rules that can accommodate every unique bride. In fact, like the wedding itself, most brides will have an existing image in their head of their "ideal" maid of honour and the expected. That said, these tips can help narrow down the choice, especially if you're feeling conflicted about the decision.

1.   Acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses: your maid of honour should complement your strengths and counterbalance your weaknesses. Be honest about who you are, what you want and recognize your limitations. Do you "think big," but have trouble with the follow through? Consider a detail-oriented sister as your maid of honour. Are you easily stressed? A calm, level-headed friend can be a soothing choice. As your primary source of moral support, the maid of honour should be your "other (better) half". 

2.   It doesn't have to be family: never feel as though you have to pick a sister or other family member to be your maid of honour. If you're very close with your sister by all means choose her. However, if there's someone else in your life you feel connected with, or whom you feel will do a "perfect job", then she may your ideal choice. 

3.   Distance does matter: the greater the distance, the harder it will be for the maid of honour to communicate and participate in wedding planning and other bridal events (for example, shopping for bridesmaid dresses
). If you need a lot of help consider a local maid of honour. 

4.   Consider the maid of honour's past and future: consider your potential maid of honour's past performance. Did she forget to water your plants when you were on vacation despite swearing she would? If she's consistently unreliable, late or forgets details she may not your best choice. On the other hand, someone who has always been there for you would make a loyal, trustworthy maid of honour. Also consider her future. If she's pregnant or going through a rough time she may not be able to devote her full attention and energy to your wedding.  

Bridesmaid Duties

The bridesmaids make up the bride's support network; they do any and all needed tasks in the months leading up to and the day o f the wedding. As the bridesmaids have fewer duties than the maid of honour they are expected to help the maid of honour as well, as required. Like the maid of honour the bridesmaids' most important responsibility is to provide the bride with moral support. This is a very stressful time for the bride. A positive attitude and a smile on your face will go a long way to relieve the bride's stress.  

Wedding Planning Duties

  • Help the bride shop for her wedding dress
  • Shop for the bridesmaid dresses
  • Help address wedding invitations
  • Help make wedding guest favours
  • Help address the bridal shower invitations
  • Help the maid of honour host the hen party
  • Attend the hen party
  • Attend the rehearsal
  • Buy the couple a wedding gift
  • Help the maid of honour as required

Wedding Day Duties

  • Get your hair and makeup done and arrive at the ceremony on time
  • Help hand out ceremony programs or greet guests if needed
  • Participate in the wedding photos
  • Stand in the receiving line
  • Help guests find their table for the dinner
  • Dance the first dance with a groomsman
  • Mingle with guests and ensure everyone is having a good time
  • Help load wedding gifts into the car for delivery to the bride's or groom's parents' house
  • Do anything the bride may require within reason



Your Bridesmaids

The bridesmaids are the bride's support network. They assist the maid of honour in completing all the tasks needed for a flawless, memorable wedding day. However, like choosing your maid of honour choosing your bridesmaids is often a complicated decision. For those lucky enough the decision is simple. For those who need more help these tips may ease the decision.

1.   Consider the number of guests: the traditional rule is one bridesmaid for every fifty guests. However, you are by no means bound by that rule. Your wedding party can be as small or large as you like. Keep in mind that larger weddings tend to be more formal in nature and therefore require more bridesmaids. On the other hand, a smaller bridal party is better suited to smaller, more intimate weddings. 

2.   Consider the personalities of the bridesmaids: select a group that will cooperate more often than not. Yes, complications and conflicts will arise, especially if you have a larger wedding party. However, your bridesmaids should be able to resolve their differences in a constructive, mature manner (without needing you to intervene). 

3.   You don't have to include family: if you're close to your sister, cousin or future sister-in-law then including her in your wedding party would seem an obvious choice. However, you don't "have to" include relatives. While including them may avoid conflict or hurt feelings, in cases where you have many female relatives, it may be easier to forgo them all instead of having to choose. In any event, your family should be understanding and supportive of your decision. 

4.   Reciprocation not required: just because you were a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding five years ago, doesn't mean you have to include her in yours. Select bridesmaids that are important in your life now, not five years ago.  




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